Check, Check

Body Check:

Two months after having a 1/4” thick piece of class stabbed into my foot, the scab finally fell off and a glossy scar remains. I can do all the things I could do before, I just can’t feel part of my toe if I touch it. That may change…or it may not. Either way, it could have been a lot worse.

I completed a pre-test of the Shuri Pine Tree Test last week and came in at 54:30, that’s 5 minutes and 30 seconds to spare, which is good because the real chin ups at the dojo are going to take longer than the ones I’ve been training with at home. I got a cold this weekend on top of last-minute waitressing, so I took the training down a knotch. Expect stats for another pre-test to be posted sometime this week.

Knee problems? What knee problems? It’s hard to believe I could barely hike up the Roan last spring without pain and now I hardly feel a thing. Many thousands of thanks-you’s to my uber-wise physical therapist in Asheville who helped me with a home program that has allowed me to continue training.


Heart Check:

I’m over the friend who was “emotionally unavailable.” Better off as friends, anyway. The only hard part about all of that, upon reflection, was accepting the fact that I am ready to date someone again. It’s hard to admit that when there isn’t anyone in your immediate life that you’re actually dating. But I’m over that difficulty, too. Yeah, sure—I’d date someone. Hello world, I’ll date someone again. Here I am. It’s summer – what better time could there be? (Ok, winters are nice too, for cuddling, winter sports, and in general having more leisure time.)

I took myself out to a nice dinner at The Vault in Asheville last week—a solo date at bar on a weeknight, no less. That’s a rare thing for me. But I had three hours to kill before picking my parents up at the airport and wouldn’t you know…I met the most fantastic guy. I don’t know if he’ll call, but I hope he does. If he doesn’t, it was at least reassuring to remember that lovely coincidences like that do happen. Especially, I suppose, if you live in the city and see more people than I do on a daily basis.

Out of the Blue

It goes like this:

9:30pm Thursday night you get a call from the baker you used to work with at the craft school. She’s a craft-school ex-patriot like you are now, too, and she’s also a damn good businesswoman. With the recent legislation in downtown Spruce Pine, NC to allow beer, wine, and liquor within town limits, your friend has it in mind to start her own restaurant. She’s done this before. She’s got the place set up. And now she needs a waitress.

4pm on Friday and you are tying on your apron for the first time since November. Beer pours differently from the taps than espresso from the machine, but you’ll get the hang of it. You haven’t waitressed in a real restaurant since you were 18 years old. It doesn’t matter. You have about 20 minutes to look at the menu, figure out the register, and orient yourself to the bar before the doors are open and the first customer walks in.

Hi. How are you? Welcome to Pizzart. I’ll be your server this evening.

[Of course, like 80% of the customer base that evening, you know all of them by name. For instance, the first customers brought their daughter, whom I sing with at Montessori. The father is a writer and applied for the same big-time NC Arts Council grant that I did…in the same category.]

By Saturday night you’ve worked 14 hours and earned $270 in tips—more money than you’ve seen in god-knows-how-long. You think: Kenia Fjords, Alaska, yeah, that’s it—a day ferry out into the North Pacific to see marine life you’ve never seen in your life and may never get to see again. You think: Or, teeth cleaning and haircut before officiating your friend’s wedding? Keep this up and you can do both.

It’s a temporary gig. Just Fridays and Saturdays for the month of July. Going to Alaska kills the chance of keeping this as a job but you don’t care. You don’t want it to last that long anyway. For now, it’s like some golden nugget someone has handed you after who-knows-how-long of biting your nails and counting your pennies.

July will be earn money month. August will be Alaska month. September will be regional rockstar month (2 book signings, 2 presentations, an exhibition, and a residency). October is, obviously, Andrew Bird month. Is it me or is time flying by?

An Open Letter

Dear Andrew Bird,

In anticipation of your October 9th, 2009 performance in Asheville, North Carolina; and given that I have been following your music since I heard its first note; and also forgiving the fact that I have burned some of your albums rather than purchasing them outright; and elating in the fact that I used to have dreams with characters who spoke your song lyrics verbatim; and especially in light of the fact that I will be driving 90 minutes one-way to see you and spending money I have not yet earned on the ticket; and knowing that you broke up with your girlfriend in 2008 during the recording of “Noble Beast” but that I have no expectations for you to like me, as they say, I was wondering if you might consider training for the Shuri Pine Tree Test so that we could run it together when you visit?

I thought it might be a nice way for you to get to know my world a little, you know, since I know so much of yours by now. We could listen to whatever music you want as we run, and if after the three miles you want to abandon the rest of the Shuri Pine Tree Test and just keeping running with me, off into the deep purple horizon, well—I think I might be ok with that, too.

With utmost sincerity and respect,
Katey Schultz

Better Than Christmas, Better Than Kissing, Better Than Wine

Oh my god there is a god and he is friends with Andrew Bird and the good city of Asheville, North Carolina!

On July 10th at exactly 12noon tickets will go on sale – online only – for Mr. Bird’s one and only Asheville performance of the year, to take place at The Orange Peel on October 9th, 2009.

Praise be to birds and Andrews and gods and cities like Asheville.

Amen.

[Now I just have to find someone with a high speed internet connection who is not working at 12noon on said day to purchase a ticket on my behalf.]

Operation Asperatus

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a new cloud.

Call it the Jacques Cousteau. Call it the roiling ocean. Call it the Armageddon. Members of the Cloud Appreciation Society are calling it asperatus and have lobbied for its official induction as the 81st official variety of cloud.

Latin for “roughened up,” you can read more and view the latest images of this cloud here. For my part, a new cloud means a new word, and a new word means new possibilities. Here we go!

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Stats: Pine Tree pre-test

30min 30sec = 3 miles

6/10 mile walk back to car, then drive 10 mins home, then immediately do

24 mins = 500 front kicks, 200 jumping jacks, 50 thai style kicks, 2 mins freestyle, 25 knuckle push ups, 100 crunches, 15 "training" pull ups, 75 punches w/ 10 lbs., 75 blocks w/ 10 lbs. - yeehaw!

Small Town Math

It’s insane but I must drive 17 miles one way to the grocery store for three items: wine, chocolate, and tampons. I am grumpy about this fact and grumpy about the cute couple ahead of me in line, and grumpy for no good goddamned reason. If you can’t tell why I was grumpy based on the three-item list, well, then—duh.

I am inside the grocery store for all of four minutes because I know exactly what I want, where it is, and who the fastest checkers are. During the course of these four minutes I see six people that I know. I skirt the first one (mother of a kid I used to teach) by fishing through my purse as though I’m looking for my grocery list. Turning down Aisle 4, I catch the profile of a glass blower I know, pivot on my heels, and head for the wine section instead. On my way to the wine, I see a fellow writer and her husband. Her nose is in Good Housekeeping and he’s trying to get her attention, “Honey! Honey? Do you have the Ingles advantage card with you?” I see the last two staring into the Breyer’s case in the frozen section and scoot by, looking up at the FROZEN PIZZAS sign opposite where they stand.

Six people! That’s 1 1/2 as many people as minutes that I spend in the store. That’s twice as many minutes as items on my list. That’s equal to the number of minutes it takes me to run one leg of the Bakersville Creek Walk. That’s one more minute than there are squares of chocolate in the teensy Dove dark bar that I buy, guiltily, thinking all the while of the Pine Tree test.

Tabata Tabooty

Thanks to tips from a friend back in Oregon, I think I may forgo interval training for Tabata training. The results sound convincing in a short amount of time…and I’ve only got about four weeks before the Pine Tree test.

Curious? Check out this informative article on Tabata Protocol. Wowzers!

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Stats: 3 miles = 31 min 40 sec